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6/22/2005

Monkeys & Borders


Let me tell you a little bit about Monkey.

He has hands for feet, and he lives in a room where the gravity's been dampened. His ears stick out further than mine and he's always smiling. His teeth are yellow and he speaks very loudly. He is enthusiastic about pretty much anything. He wears a blue coverall covered in grease stains, his name written across the breast in faded white. He smells like a toilet.

Never the less, he was one of the nicest people I've ever met.

I met him after waking up in our cramped room with Fartles nestled against me. I blinked and the dog licked my face, then farted. I left the small room in some haste and followed the sound of voices downstairs, Fartles loping at my heels...

Simon of Space - a science-fiction novel by Cheeseburger Brown
Dear readers,

It's finally happened: the free version of this science-fiction novel has been taken offline in order to make room for the hard-cover printed edition from Ephemera Bound Publishing, on sale in stores and online beginning Valentine's Day, 2008.

I regret any disappointment. I kept the free version available as long as I could. Pleasure be sure to check out the new edition! See Cheeseburger Brown.com for more information and updates.

Love,
Cheeseburger Brown

P.S. You can read more of my free fiction via my weblog or in the complete story achives.

21 Comments:

Blogger Dave decreed...

Awesome as usual Matthew... one thing I saw though:
"Forget it, retard," said shot back"

Maybe "said" should have been "she"

Keep up the great work!

Wed Jun 22, 09:43:00 AM EDT  
Blogger Niels decreed...

A more technical chapter at last! I'm just wondering... Is our sun really named Sol? 'Cause I've seen it in some other stories too.

I can't wait to see the questions in this chapter answered.

PS: I'm not sure if "upsidown" ("I'm terribly sorry," I said, upsidown) is correct. Unless it's a neologism, of course.

Wed Jun 22, 10:29:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous Christien Lomax decreed...

Friking fabulous. You keep adding little bits and pieces such as the unknown part of Jeremiah that just sits in my brain making me wonder what, why, when... with Monkey's death, it just adds to the unknown and possible.

OMG I wish I could read it all now :D If I were rich, I'd pay you to write.. endlessly, so maybe its good I'm not :D

Wed Jun 22, 10:29:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous Christien Lomax decreed...

PS: Niels, yes, our sun's name is "Sol". Now whether that is the same Sol as in the story.. well, if it is, I wonder what happed?

Wed Jun 22, 10:31:00 AM EDT  
Blogger Cheeseburger Brown decreed...

On the "proper" names of things:

One of the things I'm trying to do is to give this writing a hint of the flavour of translated text. My interest in this idea was piqued after we had Google translate "The Darth Side" for our Swiss au pair girl.

This story must neccessarily be coming to us through translation, since it is highly unlikely that far-flung people in a distant future would speak twenty-first century English.

Thus, while it possible that the widely recognized catalogue name for our home star ("Sol") might be passed down in one form or another through the generations, my usage is really meant as a kind of memetic sign-post reading, "Proper Name of Star."

It may be that the true Proper Name of Star is pronounced in a bizarre way to our ears, and indeed some speculative fictioneers do try to capture this flair with eye-bleeding, tooth-wrending alien words in their prose -- but I'm trying to keep this thing more digestible than that.

You dig?

Love,

CheeseburgerBrown

Wed Jun 22, 12:10:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous ScottieVegas decreed...

Great Stuff Mr. Brown. Leaving us as usual to wonder about Jeremiah and his true intentions.
To bad about Monkey, he would have been nice to see around in the future. Everyone can use an "A-Team" mechanic. He was kind of like a simple B.A. Baracus! What you talking about FOO?
Thanks for a nice long read! I can't wait to see it in print one day!

Leave a note if you ever make it to Vegas. I'll take you and your wife out for a Pint or three. All I'll charge is an autographed copy once it's released :)

Thanks,

SV

Wed Jun 22, 12:24:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Phssthpok decreed...

Fascinating. Maybe Jeremiah is a Chobits and he didn't like Monkey fooling with his cyberthalamus?

Or maybe it was just an accident. The suspense is killing me.

Wed Jun 22, 02:41:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Irish Wolf decreed...

I'm wondering if there is significance to the fact that Glory was so coitus-engaging anxious to get out of town when Monkey died...

Wed Jun 22, 02:55:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous decreed...

This was a WELL written episode, on par with the best that the Vader Blog had to offer. I think even RAH would be pleased.

Wed Jun 22, 08:35:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Lilaena decreed...

I'm getting a sinister vibe off of Jeremiah now. Fantastic chapter, offering a glimpse of the galaxy that is, beyond what Simon knew in the ward.

Sad about Monkey, but noticed that Fartles was featured consistently throughout the piece.

This story must neccessarily be coming to us through translation, since it is highly unlikely that far-flung people in a distant future would speak twenty-first century English. <--I hear what you're saying, and I think that it's coming across to the reader - if only through the swear words. :o)

Wed Jun 22, 09:07:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous decreed...

Hmmmm...first Duncan, now Monkey. I'm sensing a trend here. Will you be introducing us to other charming characters who will be killed off by the end of the chapter? It would have been nice to keep Monkey around longer...he was with us far to briefly.

Wed Jun 22, 11:08:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous converted decreed...

Was I the only one who noticed that Glory placed Nilo's razor in her handbag? I wonder what she'll need it for...

Thu Jun 23, 12:00:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous SithSnoopy decreed...

Dude... keep them coming! You totally rock!

If you end up publishing this BLOG, or the Vader
BLOG, I will gladly purchase the printed and
bound copy and re-read them! [And buy copies
for my friends! :) ]

I really liked Monkey... sad he lasted so short a
time. :(

Yeah, both the robot + Monkey dying, and the
whole Glory stashing the razor, are making
things a little creepy. Cool. :)

Have to admit that finding out Sol is gone was
very sad.

Thu Jun 23, 12:35:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous decreed...

So why does Glory have only one breast?

Or is that just the dialect of the translation?

Thu Jun 23, 01:03:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous decreed...

What are those flashing ornage sticks that Glory keeps inhaling?
Are they drugs? Or the equivalent of a cigarette?

Thu Jun 23, 04:25:00 AM EDT  
Blogger Sylver decreed...

Great chapter. I'm kinda glad the Jeremiah's voice module was changed, It was a good dialect, but I often find it slows me down, when I have to translate to understand what's going on. Anyway, I can't wait for the next installment!

Thu Jun 23, 09:29:00 AM EDT  
Blogger TaniaRocha decreed...

In Latin, our star was named Sol. In some Latin languages (like mine, Portuguese) it is still named Sol.

I'm loving the story, and the writing. And the way you deal with swearing is funny :)

Thu Jun 23, 02:01:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous decreed...

That robot.
I don't trust the robot.
Never did.
Never will.


Great work, I love what you are doing.


Prana

Thu Jun 23, 02:30:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Sam decreed...

Was I the only one who noticed that Glory placed Nilo's razor in her handbag? I wonder what she'll need it for...

Shaving perhaps.

Thu Jun 23, 09:25:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Cheeseburger Brown decreed...

Re: Glory's Orange Sticks

They are definitely narcotic. And illegal.

Love,

CheeseburgerBrown

Fri Jun 24, 05:26:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous decreed...

that reminds me of the Foundation novels, where Golan Trevize follows the logic that Simon does here and concludes that if we all colonized stars, there must be one original one that no one talks about.

Sun Jun 26, 12:09:00 AM EDT  

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