A Jolly Holiday
The thing I miss most about Castle Misne is awakening each morning to the same blurry view of the flared edge of bulkhead by my head where the cot met the cabin, my plastic blue diary resting in the corner with its eye casting a feeble glow into the mattress.
It was not a magnificent view, but it was consoling in its regularity. Aside from my time in the hospital it was the only period in my life in which I have slept in the same place for more than one night.
Thus, it was with a kind of pre-emptive nostalgia that I considered the polished wooden edge of the night-stand as I awoke. I smelled the heavy, warm air moved by the slowly turning ceiling-fans. I heard the pizzicato chirps and warbling laments of the birds and other assorted Solar bric-a-brac living in the trees outside.
Dear readers,
It's finally happened: the free version of this science-fiction novel has been taken offline in order to make room for the hard-cover printed edition from Ephemera Bound Publishing, on sale in stores and online beginning Valentine's Day, 2008.
I regret any disappointment. I kept the free version available as long as I could. Pleasure be sure to check out the new edition! See Cheeseburger Brown.com for more information and updates.
Love,
Cheeseburger Brown
P.S. You can read more of my free fiction via my weblog or in the complete story achives.
posted by Simon of Space at 22:17
31 Comments:
Mine again!
I shall take this (second) marvelous opportunity to compliment your work -- even go so far as to so it has inspired me to pick up my pencil again. Thanks CBB -- though you may come to regret it if I draw your readers away, though even that would be an honor.
Truman
Hail it, second comment! Interesting entry. I love reading Jeremiah's human-like actions.
Jia is a very puzzling character. On one hand, she seems to be very attracted to our Simon, but sometimes.. she acts very suspiciously. I'm actually very interested in discovering what Simon's company does - nothing has really been said of his business as of yet.
I await eagerly for the next entry.
-Ott
A Sunday night post???
Why did I have to go and check before going to bed!? It's 1:30 in the morning here in Brazil now ... and now I'm going to have to read it!
Curse you Cheeseburger Brown!
I find it most interesting that ceiling fans survived the long years since Earth. I guess some things never die.
Jia never did tell Simon where she came from... And why did she wince at his question, before that? I, too, suspect that Jia is hiding something. Not necessarily something sinister, but certainly - something.
There is nothing more suspicious than a fleeting headache that goes away quickly. One might as well hang a sign around their neck that says 'I'm hiding something'. The trick is, however, just what is Jia hiding. After all, she winced at the mention of their children; might there be some kind of tragedy in their past, a lost child perhaps?
Sunday post! you spoil us. A nice one too. Funny line of the post:
(Due to my love of nature documentaries, however, I was proud to for once not be left entirely in the lurch of ignorance. "Dinosaurs!" I exclaimed.
"Er, no," said Jia. "They're elephants, actually.")
Aha! I get to catch a typo!
"There's a place I want to show you," Jia said as he remounted our steeds." - probably should be 'we remounted'. Unless that's a man, baby!
I'm guessing that theirs was an arranged marriage. I'm also guessing that Nestor was quite self-absorbed and focused on business.
Then again, she might not even be his real wife. We all know that there's a much larger game afoot here...
Garnet, I think all she was reacting to was that Nestor was never as paternal with his children as Simon is with Pish. It's the stereotype of the wealthy man who's too busy with his company and his riches to bother with truly raising his children...
Ah, I like Sunday evening episodes.
I wonder why Jeremiah had to shade the sun from his eyes... dun dun DUNN...
brilliant work my friend.
however, a question about characters' genders..
either this is a typo,
or Jia like to go both ways..
.."There's a place I want to show you," Jia said as he remounted our steeds.
he? she? we?
also, Jia mentions her father and "his husband".. should that be "wife", or do we assume that the worlds of the future are more open to the concept of same-sex marriages than here??
FM
I like your narrative style. You don't resort to cheap tactics and phrases, and convey what the characters are thinking simply and easily. Also, I love the way that you ended dinner between Simon and Jia. I suspect it ended in the bedroom, but leaving out the details is a nice touch.
Excellent.... but I'm beginning to wonder about Simon's beginnings as Jia was reluctant to tell him. Hmmmm
Aaaah, I nice, relaxed entry, revealing more about Nestor's past and even raising a few new questions.
I really don't know where you get the time to create this CBB, but, I hope everyone else reading of Simon's adventures is as grateful as I am!
Keep up the good work!
"..her father and his husband..."
Thanks for that CBB! I like to believe that in the future love between two people--no matter the race or gender or whatever--will be honored by society.
Another good entry. Keep it up.
Cheers,
Tom
Hi CBB,
I know I always comment on spelling/grammar errors. I really do apologise for that. The truth is, I *love* your writing, and like most everyone here I can't ever wait till the next installment. I truly appreciate what you do, and I hope you take my error-correcting notes as a compliment (to help you debug and make better) rather than a nitpick. And apparently, my grammar sucks (see previous sentence).
Anyway, here we go:
As usual the air was filled by the sounds of dozens unseen creatures
Surely should be:
As usual the air was filled by the sounds of dozens of unseen creatures
And:
But now I have the grace of experience, while you the one who tumbles.
Should be:
But now I have the grace of experience, while you are the one who tumbles.
Also:
For desert we had fruit in cream and cinnamon
Should surely be:
For dessert we had fruit in cream and cinnamon
Jia is Volmash.
Dear Matt,
While I did indeed read and enjoy Orson Scott Card's ENDER'S GAME as a teenager, the subvocal speaking is not a conscious reference.
Dear all,
The posting schedule may be a little erratic this week. Big things are afoot (my wife is buying a restaurant-bar, which we're somehow going to run) and I'll be travelling for a few days.
That doesn't mean there will be no posts -- it just means they may appear at odd times.
Love,
CheeseburgerBrown
I'm getting a strong Regarding Henry deja vu, as well as some familiar vibes from Nowhere Man...
The chimpanzee bit was inspired; teach 'em enough sign language, and they get all uppity!
I'm inclined to trust Jia a bit more than most, because her actions seem genuine, if a bit guarded. Does that mean she's not just a superb actress? Perhaps not, but it seems a rather remote possibility.
Why doesn't Simon just *ask* Jeremiah some of these things he's wondering (like why he is considered an enemy)?
All in all, fantastic yet again. Ditto on wanting to know what the business of Fellcorp really is!
I know it's a nitpick, but if Maja has a nudity taboo, what's with the women sumo wrestlers and the women on the train?
Maybe that's why both Jia and Omar seemed a bit hesitant to talk about it ...?
Also, a grammatical nit to pick: what exactly is "stalky" supposed to mean?
Brilliant, the way you weave this futuristic culturescape with the "ancient" Earth we remember...
I never noticed the spelling mishaps for I can't spell to save my life. So I am at no use to you on that level.....
But here is what I think about Jia, I believe that she does love Simon and did. Maybe since he did work alot the love drifted away and now that she seen him with Pish and the way he had changed overall she sees the way "he use to be" and makes her want to take the step foward and try to make things normal between them. (the hopeless romantic side of me)
Now, with Pish and school. I don't think Jeremiah will let Pish stay out of his sight for the whole "school term". there is something brewing there. And I don't think Jia will let Jeremiah stay in the house much longer seeing that the people on their world don't use robots.
And the whole lizard thing (running around their house and all) is a bit ewwie :)
SantaMaira
The whole elephant scene reminded me so much of this site. Tranquility in motion.
Also, looks like things with Jeremiah are on their way to a head.
Calm before the storm, anyone?
"Forgive me," I said. "Many of my questions tends to be...broad." Should be 'tend'.
And I only caught this because I've read this one twice. In my first post, I was so intent upon hypothesizing that I totally neglected to comment on the episode. Excellent work, my dear Cheeseburger. This just keeps getting better and better. The little people turning out to be chimps was awesome—I never saw it coming. I figured that, like the Pegasi, they were something humans had run across whilst exploring.
You are aware, of course, that you're creating enough of a milieu for more than one story, right?
Regarding Henry! Duh!
How could I not have made that connection until
someone else posts it? [I love that movie, too.]
Totally awesome installment as always, CBB. :)
Oh, and I wish you and your wife the best of luck
in this restaurant/bar venture. :)
HOORAY! I can get a Cheeseburger at CBB's bar? SWEEEET!!! Heck. If we all start attending your place on a regular basis, no need to publish a book. We'll be drinking you into wealth! ;)
Another great post. I'm thinking about starting a similar writing session, though no sci fi. Just a bit of mystery, based here in Vegas, with many tidbits stolen and creatively expanded upon from my life.
I don't know if I have the discipline though. I don't even post to my blog daily, how could I sit down for a few hours every day and pound it out?
Yaaarggghh. I greatly respect the time you take to craft such a fine story!
Thanks and it better be a GREAT Cheeseburger! I'd expect nothing less! :)
Time to schedule a trip up North.
SV
Omar -- RIP!
more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more...
not to be demanding.. but.. :-)
I do hope Omar hasn't been done in by everyone's favorite robot (to suspect)...
BTW, I think "gingery" should be "gingerly".
Great story, wonderfully creative; keep it up!
I just finished reading everything today.
Only criticism I have is that female sumo would likely weigh more than 220 pounds.
I dated a gal once who weighed 180lbs and she was THIN. Okay, she was also 6'4". But any kind of real sumo competitor is going to be over six feet tall anyway.
So... for sumo, you're probably talking 350lbs or more to even begin to approach the kind of pendulous weight you described. Make it 400lbs and it is more believable.
But as you have it, 220lbs is just not plausible as a sumo weight.
Dear anonymous,
I live in Canada. WTF is a "pound"?
The wrestler in question weighed in at 220 kilograms, which is a healthy weight for any kind of basho you might want to have.
Love,
CheeseburgerBrown
Excellent work, Citizen Cheeseburger. I am in your thrall. Like others have stated, I point out the following thing constructively, to help in an infinitesimal way to hone this story to an even keener edge: in this segment Simon is shocked by the concept of riding a horse, when a few segments back in "Revelations, Redux" he "waved and smiled each time Pish blazed by on horseback"; and this was the second mention of such a pastime aboard Castle Misne(it was also mentioned in "A Galactic Primer"). But again, this is marvelous stuff. I'm off to read the next post.
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