Mass Of The Halcyons
A white-skinned naked man with a shaved head appeared at the door of our cell and bowed low, his pale forehead actually touching the smooth stone floor with a muted thud. His drawn, expressionless face turned up. His eyes looked like they were made of glass, and I shivered. Before the prostrate naked man could say a word Brother Phi grinned and claimed, "He says he's here to escort me to the Halcyon Hall."
He then stared at the naked man, who stared back.
Dear readers,
It's finally happened: the free version of this science-fiction novel has been taken offline in order to make room for the hard-cover printed edition from Ephemera Bound Publishing, on sale in stores and online beginning Valentine's Day, 2008.
I regret any disappointment. I kept the free version available as long as I could. Pleasure be sure to check out the new edition! See Cheeseburger Brown.com for more information and updates.
Love,
Cheeseburger Brown
P.S. You can read more of my free fiction via my weblog or in the complete story achives.
posted by Simon of Space at 07:52
60 Comments:
NO WAY! It can't end this way...!
One typo:
"I found myself in a windowed diningroom"
Need a space between dining and room.
Good grief... I do hope there's more to this than what's written today. It's a train-wreck of an ending.... *sigh*
Either Simon just "relived" the horror, or CBB just fornicated us.
I'd rather belive it is the former.
I dunno--it was really good up until the last will and testament part.
He's not so weak as to succumb to his wounds, if the previous installments has told us anything. 'Tis a flesh wound!
Do you people not read the comments?
We are being toyed with, teased, and entertained. Do not question the work of a master. There are too many loose ends here. Put your seatbelts back on cos this ride is far from over.
Oh yeah, no way this is it. There is way too much left unfinished.
Although, I really thought Faeda would be more helpful than that. It's a shame she was into the freaky-deaky. People with death fetishes aren't the best to get involved in romance with.
P.
It's guaranteed that Pish is a robot!
Less likely (but may be possible) is that Simon's a robot too, and won't die...
Either that or Glory will run in and use those "fixers" on him and he'll be ok.
Im surprised to hear of Faeda's fate, but I think there's some double-crossing here and she didn't know the whole story....
One word: Duncan.
He was not captured by the police but rather the Citadel and has been there ever since. At least I hope.
Well, I'm confident that things aren't ending at this point (at least I think they're not).
But wow...Faeda being such a freak. Olorio really being Volmash.
Now that Simon has some answers, I do hope he survives long enough to make some use of them!
::Reads the end::
..wow...that fellates...
i sense another massive plot twist approaching at high speed..
this story is one of the greatest things i've ever read.
Simon's not dead. CBB's already said we have more worlds to visit. Olorio's not Volmash. If he was, why would he need Simon to create a new horror? He'd already done it once. And if the Citadel and Fellcorp were such enemies, how did Faeda end up doing her recovery in a far-off Fellcorp facility - where you just know she was fitted with some special 'software' upgrades?
Lovely plot twists, CBB! But they're all beautiful trees designed to keep us from seeing the forest.
Captain Gold said: " The point is that no beast can escape his nature, and however you might dress it up, our race thrives on blood." If you wanted to enslave/eliminate the human race, brute force wouldn't be the way to do it. Much more guile would be required.
I agree... it WOULD fellate if this were the end... but the more I read of the comments, I can see where it may and will continue.
Damn you CBB for being such a good storyteller that you scared the faeces out of me! LOL
The best part is that, due to its serial nature, this story keeps you guessing until next time! Dang, now I can see why this episode took so long to show.
"I felt a breeze inside of me..."
That can't be good.
Now for some typo/grammos:
I smelled incenses
I'm pretty sure there's no plural of "incense" (at least in this sense).
dancers dressed as blue and orange birds fawned fans over robed figures
How do you "fawn" a fan?
Its walls were high and carved into complex curlicues, each branding into a niche at the bottom
Branding=branching? Also, is this reminiscent of the Kamari art which once decorated Jeremiah?
but I had gleaned the world of people
You don't glean a location, but rather an item (or items) from a location.
She looked up, held my eyes a moment, and the ceremoniously filled her glass
The=then?
The Nightmare Canon
Unless this is the standard by which all nightmares are judged -- instead of a weapon fueled by nightmares -- there should probably be an extra "n".
Man, every time you've left us on the edge, I think "it can't possibly get any more suspenseful than this". Obviously, I continue to be wrong.
Whew.
One typo
"If she cannot fulfill her duties than let his robot Jeremiah"
Should be "If she cannot fulfill her duties then let his robot Jeremiah"
I can't wait for the next installment.
LM
Dear Dave,
No Dave, this isn't the end.
It's a false ending, in order to highten reader anxiety as you plow worriedly through the end of the episode, and designed to maximize the suspense of the cliffhanger.
I'm sorry this wasn't posted on Friday, but I'm pretty swamped by life right now. Finding time to write is becoming increasingly difficult.
As has been pointed out, we still have more worlds to visit before this tale is done. There are many, many questions yet to be answered -- and some of those which have already been answered shall be reconsidered, and the falsehood of those apparent answers dismantled before the truth is fully exposed.
Love,
CheeseburgerBrown
Ick... why can't Simon seem to keep it in his pants.. or robe or whatever. Hasn't he learned by now that'll get you in trouble. Glory's gonna be pissed if she finds out. He's a bigger 'ho' than she is... is there a girl he's met that he hasn't ..?.. yep... but watch out Dr. Pemma, or you'll be next.
I think I figured out what the Nightmare cannon is. eww ... lol.
Thanks CBB... I feel a lot better now.. *chuckling*
There IS reason to live!
EWWWWWWWWWWWW anonymous!!!
Dear Anonymous,
The guy's only had sex three times in his whole life. Give him a break.
Love,
CheeseburgerBrown
Yeah, for cripes sake! You think about when you had only done it twice, you were looking to hit anything that walked.
Poor Simon, at least he thought she was hot.
In the World Of Simon, one can't take anybody's words at face value. Don't just take Faeda's fanatic ravings as truth, she might not even know the full truth.
So anyway, somehow Faeda believed that Dr. Pemma's tinkerings would give her knowledge of the Nightmare Cannon's whereabouts? This would indicate that the Nightmare Cannon is somehow hidden in those blocked memories in Simon's head.
Is Dr. Pemma knowingly involved? If so, she put on a good act. From her initial negative reaction to Simon, and her revelation that Pish is not biologically normal, give me the impression that she's not one of the conspirators.
I'm really starting to wonder what Duncan's role in all this is.
If Olorio is Volmash, (Faeda never gave Simon a clear affirmative) does that mean Jeremiah is property of Olorio?
And that bird! WHAT is the DEAL with that odorous bird?
Good job, CBB. I find myself pondering Simon Of Space during many moments over the weekend, and any time I spend away from the computer.
MORE SoSCRACK! post haste master author, feed my addiction!
okay, here it is, out of the blue...Simon is Terron, Fell be Volmash. the birds, those have something VERY important to do with the horror, but that's a duh. i still haven't figgered out if they are the nightmare cannon, or the devices used to record the terrors transmitted. hmm...think out loud..."which of these birds means anything to you?"...he holds the key to finding the cannon...the birds are the cannon, or at least some huge piece of the puzzle that gives the cannons location.
interesting twist. i like the what it feels like to die bit. very interesting. and the dying blog, i may use that in my own blognovel. i love it, great effect.
i love your work dude
TRH
www.xanga.com/jason_freelie
Finding Simon of Space among the mass of the internet is like finding the creamy peanut butter filling of a filled chocoate in the middle of a gigantic Katamari. I guess if I had to sum it up in one sentance, that'd be it. =D
Three times = twice with prostitues (though in the nicest possible way) and once with a sadistic psychopath.
Yes, Simon does deserve a break, poor guy.
And you have to admit that he has extraordinary guts, self-control, and primal instincts - those of a professional spy - for not showing Faeda his discomfort and for not having any performance anxiety under that pressure.
Re: Simon the slut
We have no way of telling what he was like before the mind-drain!
Also, after leaving the hospital, anyone he's spent ANY considerable time with, he's slept with.
Evidence my dear Watson...
Just then Glory Pish and Jeremiah wondered into the room to look for Simon. Apon entering the room they found Crushed Head Faeda lying slightly crumpled with her mouth open and a look of horror across her face.
and on the floor was Simon in a puddle of his own blood.
No No,... Pish will not see such a thing. He must retain his innocense.
.
CBB, can you give us a hint on when we might see another post. I don't thinK I can wait till Fri... It would be worse than the Horror itself.
Remember, everyone: the more money CBB makes from SoS, the more he can justify working on it!
The donation button is at the bottom of the menu on the right side of the main page.
And no, I don't get kickbacks. I just hate to see a man have to decide between something he loves and something that will earn a living.
Are you kidding I think Pish has seen more in his wee years than I have in my 25.
Anyway Pish ain't a "real" boy...
Or at least not than I think....
Nah, he is one of them life like robots. And the reason that he was made was because Duncan lost his real son.
And he stached something within Pish so that no one would find it and when the right times comes Pish will show us the "real" Pish..
OK maybe I over did myself??
But something is a little off with him I just can't put my finger on it..
Hummm
I think Dr. P would have noticed if Pish was Fleshy-Bot. He's just a kid missing a hormone or two. :)
;'D
I ain't arguing with you!!
""Mother of love," I whispered, "I am killed."
This seemed like a dramatic thing to say, but I recognized that my ability to say it meant I had not actually expired."
Ha! That's one of the best bits yet!
And no, Simon hasn't had sex with anyone he's spent a significant amount of time with... he's been with Pish and Jeremiah pretty much from the beginning and their relationship is pretty platonic so far.
I'm not even going to try to speculate.
Ah I love the split personality psychotic that Faeda was suffering from. Terribly beautiful.
And I do not believe that Faeda stabbed him in self defense - Simon strangled HER in self defense. Faeda was struggling with the Lady Aza that existed before the attack, and the Crushed Head Faeda that existed afterwards. Faeda was always fairly violent, only her body wouldn't allow her to do much more than throw things at people.
Fully restored, both personalities merged into one hideous entity.
Profiting from the Horror and needing the Recovery to continue forever... very cool. Love the chapter, looking forward to more.
Majestic.
Well, now that I know it's not the end of the line, from reading the comments. Before that, it was another "Uhhhhhhhhhhh...?"
CBB, with respect to what sheik yerbouti said about donating: Would it be more useful to you for us to donate directly (thereby avoiding publishing overhead), or buy a copy of "Goodbye to Kitty" so that you have hard numbers to show any prospective publishers?
I dontated back in the darthside days, and I'd like to do so again, but I want to send my money where it'll be of the most use.
Also, what's with John "Anonymous" Casino Poker guy? I assume this engine lets you delete posts (like this one, once it becomes irrelevant)...
What the hell is going on? Is this someone's idea of a joke, or has some blogspam robot gone haywire???
ahhahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
ty, cbb.
for a wonderful pseudo-ending.
and for the explanation, lol.
i was led, and lifted, and let go.
it was beautiful, my fall.
also:
"She looked up, held my eyes a moment, and theN ceremoniously filled her glass from a tall, sweating bottle of clear fluid at her elbow."
ahh, i hate these comment-O-bots...
Usually, I'm a robot softie myself, but ALL SPAMBOTS MUST DIE HORRIBLY AND PAINFULLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, now I feel better...
I'm pretty sure Simon hallucinated a lot of that - perhaps his subconscious' way of justifying unpleasant action.
Line of the day: "... I, Nestor Simonithrat Fell -- er, apparently -- being of sound mind and lacerated body ..."
HA!
Holy S**t Dude!
Whoa!
You keep blowing my mind. Over, and over, and over, and....
Very much looking forward to yet another episode!
I'm not certain I like where some of this is going... a lot of it sounds much like the criticism of the 'military industrial complex'. ie, the accusations that people profit from war, therefor those people will attempt to make war.... When in fact, those people are as human as the rest of us.. and like the rest of us, would not consider doing such a thing.... and even so, such a thing would require a huge conspiracy of many ordinary humans.
Perhaps the point here would be that these corporations (citadel and fellcorp) are no longer run by human beings though?
To me, it seems likely Simon was an Olorio trap for Faeda... sent with an implanted program to assassinate her. Would make sense as to why he met her in the hospital.
Of the prior events, the most likely to not have been staged would be the initial encounter with Pish. The likelihood of Simon escaping into the woods and randomly getting to where he ended up is pretty low... so I tend to trust that as genuine.
Most of the rest so far is highly suspect, as far as whether appearance is indeed reality.
Excellent chapter, CBB.
-fooburger
----------------------------------
A Public Service Announcement for all Women Reading SoS
----------------------------------
Please avoid all sexual contact with one (1) Mr. Nestor Simonithrat Fell. Recent studies show that intercourse with Mr. Fell can only result in one of three things.
A. Severe hemmorgaging of the sinus lining and brain tissue or aneurysm, resulting in death.
B. Contraction of an exceptionally painful and incurable STD affecting the nervous system, resulting in death.
C. Severe retriction of the trachea by Mr. Fell during copulation, resulting in death.
You have been warned.
----------------------------------
End of Public Service Announcement
----------------------------------
Shorthand:
girl + Simon = ded girl
Stinks to be attrached to the mental institution types...
ded girl????
DEAD GIRL????
Good one though...
Umm...BTW, Glory had AssAIDS before Simon came along.
Really, this is quickly becoming uncouth.
Know when to draw the line, people.
Love,
CheeseburgerBrown
CBB,
I don't think anyone will mind if you edit some of these out. ... well someone will, but it's the internet, someone always complains. It's you're site though.
... and what are you doing checking posts... you should be writing... Don't make us come over there and get all "Misery" on your butt. Breakin' your ankles so you can't go to work and you have to stay home and keep us entertained. heh ... don't think we haven't thought about it.
{creepy breathing}
;)
Dear Jeff S.,
The sooner I get my work done, the sooner I can type up more SoS.
I am currently double-booked. That means that today has been sold twice over before we even get to Simon.
I'm just checking in now and again while the patience bar crawls on my main workstation.
Love,
CheeseburgerBrown
"Patience bar"... I love it.
Thanks for joining us when you can. Who knows? If there isn't another post today, I might actually get some work done... which happens less these days since I know they're getting rid of my group soon, and that sort of knowledge isn't much of a motivator :-D
Mr. Brown,
Thanks for a fantastic chapter. I got to this one really late this time around. I do have a couple of typos that I found, if that's ok with you. BTW, CBB, I know I do this a lot personally, so please do let us know if you're sick of all the typo catching.
So here:
held my eyes a moment, and the ceremoniously filled her glass
should be:
held my eyes a moment, and then ceremoniously filled her glass
and I lost the first typo, which was early on in the story. I'll re-comment when I have it.
Thanks again,
Seemant
I think that's the third time that typo's been mentioned (read the other comments).
Uncouth...
I like that word.
Thanks for the 50cent word.
I just hope i can remember it when the time is right.
You continue to improve your storytelling skill CBB! I'm enjoying this and get frustrated when I miss a chapter or two. I also feel that Simon is in fact Volmash.
Please let us know if it's better to buy a book or donate. I'm overdue for sending a few bucks your way!
Thanks for continuing on this journey!
SV
At the risk of posting too often, I figured I'd add another favorite quote:
"I'm not entirely sure my actual children are real. It's on my list of matters that need looking into."
Man this installment was boneriffic.
Bravo CBB! And eee-gads on the gradual build-up and release. (small pun intended) I didn’t expect Aza to freak out into Faeda; how wonderful!
You’ve made me fall in love with Faeda – again. Then you kill her!
…bastard…
(sigh) She had me at her fantasies of wailing chaos rocketing off the silent walls of the Citadel; from there it only got better. I’ve always been a bit of a softie for the cutlery pitching, dueling yin/yang female personality sorts in my life.
Then again a chick throwing knee-high black boot kicks at Nuns is pretty damn hot too! ;-) Gotta love Glory.
Ok - onto speculation...
If all the characters are “real” then:
The wine was drugged.
Jia ain’t dead & knew Simon “before”.
Pish is an executive; barring that the Doc isn't in on it. If so, then he's the robot child of Jeremiah’s.
Jeremiah is sentient & rebellious against the fleshies and assisted/guided Volmash in his plans/horrors.
Glory was in with the Volmash crowd & is watching Simon now; pretending it’s for Volmash, but it’s because she loves him.
Aza was genuine & kind until the accident, then tampered with to get the current result/incarnation.
Simon was a co-conspirator that helped Volmash with the Horror & still carried the key info about it.
(e.g. Volmash == Emperor, Simon == Anakin)
He was wiped after engineering Aza’s damage, allowing the Fellcorp Docs to work on him and to improperly re-image her crystal-personality to create the beautiful dual-beastie I hate to love.
Note: I believe he began choking her first; a fail safe programmed into him in the case someone got control of him. And she got control of him for sure…
Oh, Olorio is a façade. Blighton is Volmash, and the one who “publish[es] in the form of galactic history”
Now, onto WILD speculation...
Barring the above:
Simon is Volmash. The characters in the story are aspects of himself.
His condition is a psychedelic treatment regime of Mind Mojo wrought by others (Blighton) as part of a penance….
…of his own design? Perhaps by setting himself up into new situations to see if a “cleansed” (i.e. no memory) self would make the same choices??? Nahhh...
Either way…
"The screams of children are special to me," said Faeda dreamily, twisting a lock of her hair in her fingers. After a pause she yanked the hairs out of her head, and let them drift to the floor. "What's special to you, Simon?"
OMG, How can you *NOT* love that?
A thought or two
Faeda wants 2 things-
1) another Horror to be inflicted upon humanity, so that Citadel's work will continue, and her family will hold power, and
2) to be free of the Citadel and her responsibility to it, by any means possible.
How can she accomplish both?
I speculate that she somehow recorded the experiences of her S&M/snuff session with Simon as ammunition for the next Nightmare Cannon salvo.
"The Nightmare Cannon is not a creative device, but a projective one. To transmit its payload of ultimate suffering it must first record it."
Corinthia Tag
On a different subject, does anybody have any ideas on how Simon might have lost his leg pre-memory wipe?
How can she accomplish both? ...
Most devilish thinking kumar.
Aza, being who she was, devising a disaster for her psyche -- to do for her what she could not?
Then using that scene as N'Cannon material?
Nice...
re: leg injury.
Inflicted on a by-stander (simon) to draw him info the fray?
typo:
After a long moment he released he, and glanced at his hairless servant.
I think the second 'he' is supposed to be a 'him'.
It won't end like this. It can't, due to the many plot twists.
It doesnt necessarily mean that Simon will live, though.
It could pass on to Pish, couldn't it?
Before I go onto speculations, I have to say what an awesome chapter and series so far. I could go into much much much much detail, but I think it'd be wasted space until the end of the series, where there will be an orgasmic explosion of awe.
And I hope that Dr. Pemma isn't evil. I like her!
Speculation:
-For some reason I keep on getting the feeling that Pish is entirely central to this novel. Why? Because everything is centred on him. Jeremiah refuses to kill Simon because he is the protector of Pish. I think this is all a big set up for Pish, who will turn out to be some a) world-saviour b) filthy rich bugger c) heir to some other thingy
...and i have just discovered another entry! More later!
HOLY,
MOTHER-FORNICATING,
COITAL,
FAECES.
I don't like Faeda anymore :(.
I'm glad she is killed.
Hehe "I am killed". That line rocks.
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